


When the Stars Fall, I Will Lie Awake

by Catclaw



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, M/M, Ooops..., This was supposed to end more hopefully...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-02-15
Updated: 2008-02-15
Packaged: 2019-04-06 15:52:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14060322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catclaw/pseuds/Catclaw
Summary: Basically three angsty snippets from ’82 to ‘94





	When the Stars Fall, I Will Lie Awake

He sat in an armchair beside the fire, curled in on himself, the feeling of betrayal and anger as fresh as it had been the day James and Lily had been killed. Pain filled eyes turned towards his companion, desperately seeking answers.  
“Why couldn’t I see it?” He shook his head sadly, auburn hair slipping from behind an ear to partially obscure his face. The beast within him howled in rage as a tear slipped down his face at the way its mate had so casually thrown him away, destroying everything he had thought they had both loved.

The elder man sitting opposite him smiled kindly at him, fingers resting consolingly against his hand briefly.  
“We are often most blind to those closest to us.” The older wizard smiled sadly, momentarily lost in his own pained memories. “Love has a way of making us see only what we want to. It was nothing you did and there was nothing you could have done.” The words would have no effect on the younger man, that he knew from experience and though he wanted to tell him the pain lessened with time, it would only be a cruel lie.

Unconsciously the amber eyed man tugged the long sleeves on his robes down, covering the vivid scars on his arms, only one man had ever claimed to have loved those and it had turned out to be a lie. Brilliant blue eyes caught the motion, but knew better than to speak. It was going to be worse for the younger man than it ever had been for him with Grindelwald, at least they hadn’t mated for life.

*

The staff meeting fell into a hush as Albus announced the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, all aware of his lycanthropy and his past associations. Especially now that Black had escaped.  
“Are you sure that is wise Headmaster?” Severus drawled, voicing the opinions of many that were sitting there.  
“Perfectly sure,” came the serene answer. Albus had seen the wreck that Remus had been after Sirius had betrayed him, knew there was no way that Remus would allow Black to find away into the school and bring harm to anyone, especially not Harry. “Whilst many of you will know of Remus’ past friendship with Sirius Black, and the rest of you will undoubtedly be filled in by your colleagues, I would also like to remind you that he was a damn good friend of both James and Lily Potter, he would never, ever, do anything to put their son in danger.

“As for his lycanthropy, there is a potion that allows him to retain his human mind. Severus, I would ask that you would brew this for him whilst he is here with us.” His tone left no room for argument. Albus was determined that now, more than ever, Remus would have company around him to help bear the pain.

*

The months passed quickly and once again it was February. God he hated February. Lupercalia, it had been on Lupercalia back in 1976 when he and Sirius had mated, the moon had been full that night and they had spent all day in bed before Padfoot had run with Moony all night.

It was the February moons that Moony was the most desperate to break free of the Wolfsbane, his magical prison, to howl and tear and destroy and if he caught himself in the destruction then so much the better.

The wolf whimpered and the man inside tried to crawl further under his desk, hiding from the world. The wolf didn’t care who knew how it was feeling, it didn’t have the same inhibitions as the man and his sorrow showed on his furry face for all to see.

Remus tensed as he heard footsteps approaching his office, not that students were supposed to be wandering the corridors at this late hour, but then he knew better than most about breaking that particular rule.

The door creaked open and through the minute gap under the desk his sharpened senses caught the hem of purple robes and familiar, comforting smell.

One look at the wolf that moved as though the weight of the world was upon him and Albus felt his heart break for him. Moving to sit next to him, he stroked though the thick fur, giving comfort as best he could. Gratefully, Remus rested his head against the older man’s thigh, fighting the urge to cry.

They stayed that way for the rest of the night, both lost within the memory of the love and heartbreak that two men had caused them.


End file.
